May 2002 Archives
May 30, 2002
so its settled. the plymouth is crunched, gone, and no longer my worry. kind of sad to see it go - it was our first car, and all. and it was the first vehicle i ever had that would be considered a 'car'. previously i had an 86 gmc pickup; before that, an 84 chevy blazer.
oh well. out with the old, in with the new.
thats right, we got a new car! we got it from a great dealer and got a great deal on it. what more could we want?
the rundown: 1998 ford escort zx2 coupe. 2 door. front wheel drive.
v6 4cyl [jesse knows]. 1.something liter. ok, so i dont remember them all. i do know the most important thing: its cherry red. and we got a 4 year extensive warranty with it.
this is the newest and nicest vehicle i have ever driven. well, ok - not true. i drove my motheres 2000 gmc yukon a few times, one of which i
had caused a major accident. so that doesnt really count.
i am so excited to finally have a reliable vehicle that we wont have to pour another couple thousand into in 6 months to keep it running.
i am a happy camper. we test drove it yesterday during lunch. that afternoon we scrambled to fill out financing paperwork. drove back to the dealership after work, parked across the street in view of the car, and prayed until God gave us an answer.
He is so good to us - i am kind of glad now that He took the plymouth from us. otherwise, i would have never agreed to getting another car. especially one so nice. man, i feel blessed.
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord , "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jereimiah 29:11
May 30, 2002
karen just gave me a headset to use for answering the phone. woohoo!!
May 28, 2002
our plymouth is as good as scrap metal. the oil-like substance spewing from the mustang is really power-steering liquid. and we need a new car.
looking for a car wells up all the anxiety within me. i become very stressed, heart rate accelerates, and i stop looking at the cars and start looking through them.
i dont know much about vehicles, and im scared to death of being screwed - or being haggled into buying a lemon. and i am nothing close to a spender.
b loves to spend and spend and spend. i have a hard time letting myself buy something that is unnecessary. and the thought of shelling out a few thousand dollars makes me hyperventilate.
i tried explaining to b yesterday how and why it stresses me out so - he then proceeded to tell me all the reasons i shouldnt. gotta love that as a response. he never did understand why that was the worst thing he could have done, but at least he apologized.
so now i must push myself to go look at vehicles tonight all the while purposefully breathing in and out. in and out.
bah. i want to go home and fall asleep under the covers.
May 25, 2002
hit the garage sales hard today and spent about $70. i got...
a large rice steamer for $1
a black down vest for $1
a cake platter with lid
a sewing machine for $5
a few books
a decorative hanging shelf from the 40s for $10
a pewter plate and 3 pairs of pewter gobblets for $30
man i feel like i scored. the pewter set isnt exactly matching - each of a pair of gobblets match, but the three pair dont match each other. no bother - theyre pewter. i was able to talk the guy down from $40 to $30 for the set - they were all individually marked. i am starting a semi-serious collection for pewter. ebay anyone?
the other thing i got from the days worth of yard sale hopping is a nasty sunburn. i did all of the driving for the group, and my entire left arm, left shoulder, and the top of my left breast is all crispy. lovely. at least my sun allergy didnt break out.
May 23, 2002
still at work. i should be home eating ice cream. am instead waiting for bridger to swing by here with the work flatbed (hes on delivery) which, if everyone has left his work by the time hes done (6.30ish), we will be driving home. in the flatbed, you see.
wonder if it will fit in our assigned parking space.
i think i may have obtained my first sex-induced injury: a pulled thigh muscle. am pretty darn proud of that. and to think that my mother-in-laws shower played a major role in spoken injury...
man i hope b's mom (or my mom, for that matter) doesnt read this stuff. im certain my mom doesnt, but im not so sure about b's mom.
oh well - a sons sex stories will put hair on her chest. heehee.
May 23, 2002
the trip to homer was wonderful - what a blessing to see moe walk, hear her name called, and flip her tassle. cried so hard that i couldnt even take any pictures - had to leave that up to b. now i must waste the rest of the film and develop them so i can show my three fans what she looks like in her gown and cap.
all that driving (over 600 miles each way) must have pooped out our mustang - drove it into the parking lot here at work this morning when the power steering quit and some smoke came from under the hood. poped the hood and saw an oil-like substance coating the inside. also saw a trail of the viscous liquid on the ground. hope that its just a blown gasket or something.
argh. ARGH. and im soooo tired. but thats nothing new, now is it.
May 19, 2002
its sunday, and i have been up since 8. what a shame. one would almost think our church was in the morning instead of the afternoon.
if that were the case, though, i wouldnt be sitting here typing this. nor would i have the time to pack this morning and i
would should have done it last night. we would be able to leave for homer around noon instead of 3ish. but b would miss his eye doctors appointment.
dont know why i ran through all that. hm.
last night i gace lacey a haircut and a bath. towards the end she was yelling and crying so much the neighbors surely think i killed her. which i wanted to do. shes so touchy about that back left leg. i wonder if theres something wrong with her hip or something...
but now she looks so pretty. looks like a mini schnauzer. amazing.
now to attack the packing. dont know why im procrastinating - i only need enough stuff for 4 days or so.
May 17, 2002
What shampoo do you use?
i have fallen in love with the friz-eaze shampoo and conditioner. they are the first set that, after getting out of the shower, i can take my brush and run it from my scalp to the end of my hair. about 18" of wet hair. that is an amazing feat!!
Do you use conditioner? What kind?
im kind of a conditioner slut. i love the friz-eaze regular conditioner as well as its deep conditioning creme. ooh - looove just putting it on and leaving it to soak in while i shave. but the best conditioners in the entire world? most any that come within a hair dye box. i dont dye my hair, so i must mooch off of my brother. i also use infusium 23 leave-in conditioning spray if i use any other shampoo/conditioner combination. it completely rocks.
When was the last time you got your hair cut?
gotta trim three or four weeks ago - im due for another. havent cut my bangs since i was about 11. havent cut all my hair since i was 8 or so.
What styling products do you use?
i have used a gel spray to keep some of my natural curls curly. other than that, i use my brush, sometimes a comb for a straight line, and a bunch of hair bands. even if i dont brush my hair in the morning, i can always put it up into a purposefully messy bun.
What's your worst hair-related experience?
only one i can think of was the height of my hair for senior prom three years ago. the lady teased and teased the top of my 'do - it stuck up about 3 inches, i swear. took some work but i finally got it tamed down.
May 15, 2002
doc says the stang will make it to homer and back. woohoo!
b spent a lot of time last night cleaning it out and even put the fuzzy seat covers on it - they came with the car but we havent used them because its been b's work car. it makes my seat much more comfy.
but bob, the boss guy, actually offered the use of his big blazer for the trip. whatta great guy.
im very excited to be going to homer, seeing moe graduate. im so proud of her. i hope i dont cry...
gotta do laundry tonight. which bites. we havent done it in about a month, so its gonna take forever. and all i want to do is go to sleep. right now would be good. but we need to have some clothes to see our parents. they might be a little worried otherwise.
which reminds me - i have to call john and see if we can crash at his place sunday night in anchorage. havent seen them since the christmas trip to homer.
May 14, 2002
something does not want us to go to homer next week.
the tang is at the shop - mechanic told b that before doing any fluid change or tune-up, he was going to check out a knocking in the engine. he didnt think it sounded good. is expecting to have to replace the entire engine.
he was going to try running some oil-cleaning-crap through the engine to try to help the noise. if that didnt work, he highly reccomends not driving it to homer.
i just feel like screaming. why is it that every time we plan a trip to homer something in our vehicles goes terribly wrong?? it feels as though this is some sort of spiritual attack to keep us in fairbanks. but why? for crying out loud, why??
maybe ill see if damon will let us drive his truck down...
May 14, 2002
our car is dead.
sunday night, we drove beth home. then about 100 yards from our apartment we hear this 'thwappa-thwappa-thwappa' and the car dies, oil light comes on. we were doing about 40mph, so we coasted a fair amount of the way to the apartment - then b got out and pushed.
we thought at first that it was our alternator belt that slipped off and/or broke because it has been squeeking pretty badly ever since all that flooding around here a few weeks ago. but the belt was firmly in place.
however, there were a few hoses that were no longer attached to the engine - the air intake among a few others we couldnt identify. b plugged all the hoses back in and decided to try to start the car again.
so were currently back to one vehicle. which sucks because he leaves for work about a half hour earlier that i ever do. so now i have to get up earlier [grumble]. and i just realized that hes now on summer hours: 8-6. and i work 8-5. hmm.
the big question: will the mustang make it to homer? moe is graduation on monday - so is b's sister jayme. and we are really desperately wanting to be there. but is this car healthy enough to withstand a 10(ish) hour drive?
it is, this very moment, at the shop. b dropped it off after dropping me off here at work. it is getting a tune-up and a fluid change and a simple check-up to see if the mechanic thinks we should drive it to the other side of the state. and i dont want to carpool with my brother - 4 adults, three dogs in a 4 person car. egads.
this truck my father is wanting us to buy from him is seeming like a more viable option now. but it is my fathers. in high school he accidentally drilled a hole in the engine head of the red chevy blazer i was driving. and filled it with super glue. he was trying to drill out a rusted bolt so that he could connect a block heater. after then getting me a blue gmc truck to drive around, he promptly sold it to some lady.
three months later the engine seized. he claims it was because she never checked the oil and she ran low. unlikely. i never checked the oil - it didnt have a leak and rarely needed checking because it was never low. so her engine seized. perhaps because the super glue plug fell out?
ive not really trusted in any vehicles hes sold before. but this truck was my sisters (she just bought a sweet new vehicle worth more than my two when they were both running), and she loved it. just needed more passenger space for all her admirers. and she said that they never had to do anything to it the year she drove it.
but i hate buying things. spending money - especially $2000 - really stresses me out. bah.
May 11, 2002
we participated in a 5k Buffet last night - a walk benefiting local charities. every few blocks there was a food booth set up to feed the participants. chicken, fruits, sausages, stew, and clam chowder. it was a lot of fun. and its been a long time since doing something like that with b. there was a lot of sexual energy between us - felt like we were in high school again.
for some reason we love behaving innapropriately in a public setting. i dont know if its the thrill of being caught, because we dont behave so innapropriately that my mother would be embarassed. and i dont think we are putting on a show for what doesnt happen at home (i know a few couples like that), because when things arent intimate between us at home then we are like ice to each other in public.
but still a hand slips down to the curve of a butt cheek. eyes are drawn to each other. arms interlace. perhaps we should stay in public more often.
if no ones noticed, the comments are being broken. they are having an identity crisis. and i dont know how to fix it. ive tried everything i can think of - so if anyone out there has some knowledge with greymatter and its templates, please please help me.
today is brought to you by the letter s and the number 3.
May 9, 2002
happened across my virtual model the other day. it was fun making myself, though i was a little dissapointed that i didnt have as much control over her looks that i would have liked. she doesnt really even look like me. the body structure is surprisingly similar, though.
in other unrelated news, i am 18% evil. how evil are you?
May 8, 2002
how the evening really went:
took the longest route on my way home to make sure b didnt go to our appointment. casually mentioned that he could take me out to eat. fell asleep on the couch. made b promise to wake me when he got hungry, stripped and moved to the bed where i promptly fell even deeper asleep. got up around 8 to see b finish eating his make-shift dinner. finished the rest of titan ae with b. nuked two quesadillas and drank half a pitcher of lemonade. hopped online.
woo freaking hoo.
May 8, 2002
half hour to go until i get to leave work for my
lovely home. i plan to do nothing until five but post on my site.
we saw that couples counselor - mike - yesterday. came out of that feeling really great. he told us that we have a solid foundation, and a great presence as a couple. and since we have met each other in social situations, he said that he knows we have a lot of fun when we are together.
i had scheduled another appointment with a christian counselor for this evening (five), but all afternoon i felt God telling me to cancel it. so i did. i think we are going to continue seeing mike.
after the appointment b and i felt like we were in high school skipping 6th period. so we went and got coffee. yeah. was great.
am feeling like water today. not good; not bad; just - there.
the idealist evening: go home, have my husband say 'youve done so much for me this week that i want to take you out to dinner to show my appreciation," back home, curl up under our down comforter with my dog and my husband, fall asleep to a movie.
the realist evening: drive home behind some semi 'student driver,' stand in the sweltering hot kitchen cooking some greasy dinner, gather up (and separate) all the dirty clothes, nag b until we actually go do laundry, work on my secretary job during the spin cycle, back home, fold the clothes and make the bed, give the dog a bath, collapse into bed.
what happened to the days that my mom did my laundry? granted, that was when i was 10. but i sure do miss it. at least we had a washer and dryer in the next room rather than down the block.
and my back hurts. i think im going to whine about it. and with that i just lost all three regular visitors to this site.
May 3, 2002
tuesday night after bible study, the study group - sans b - went on a field trip to alaskaland. found a nice gondola with a tiny grill and proceeded to burn all of the paperwork b had collected for everquest.
all of his quests, maps, race/class specifications, spells, etc went up in flames.
He has sent Me to bind up the broken-hearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to those who are bound; ...to comfort all who mourn; to give to them beauty for ashes... - Isaiah 61:1,2,3
the question arose: what beauty do i hope will come from these ashes? my answers:
- renewed relationship with my husband
- removing temptation and the possibility of his returning to the game
- convincing myself of the finality and seriousness of his decision
- ability to move forward
- ability to see the front of his face insetead of the back of his head
- receiving the support i need
- removing the ability for him to look through all the papers and regret his decision
during the quasi-ceremony, we sang, prayed, and even did some dancing to avoid the jumping glowing piece of paper (it was raining and terribly windy). my brother helped my place crumpled papers into the flames, his wife held the stick for probling the flames and keeping the ashes in the grill pit as much as possible, and beth ripped the file folders into pieces - they dont burn too well.
when we destroyed the glossy users manual that came with the cd, it produced the most awful stench. but it had to be done. it felt great seeing that scantilly-clad, boobs-bursting-out-of-top blonde on the cover of that book melting and charring.
and we found that cds dont break very easily. thats right - we broke the cds too. beth was actually able to bend one in half with out it breaking. i tried the same stunt and had it shatter in my hand.
actually set up an initial meeting with a counselor. turns out we have mutual friends, so the counseling might not work out. but i have made the first step. i will do anything to get us back on track. no marriage is supposed to be this way.
beauty for ashes.