rhapsodic.org

our plymouth is as good

our plymouth is as good as scrap metal. the oil-like substance spewing from the mustang is really power-steering liquid. and we need a new car.

looking for a car wells up all the anxiety within me. i become very stressed, heart rate accelerates, and i stop looking at the cars and start looking through them.

i dont know much about vehicles, and im scared to death of being screwed - or being haggled into buying a lemon. and i am nothing close to a spender.

b loves to spend and spend and spend. i have a hard time letting myself buy something that is unnecessary. and the thought of shelling out a few thousand dollars makes me hyperventilate.

i tried explaining to b yesterday how and why it stresses me out so - he then proceeded to tell me all the reasons i shouldnt. gotta love that as a response. he never did understand why that was the worst thing he could have done, but at least he apologized.

so now i must push myself to go look at vehicles tonight all the while purposefully breathing in and out. in and out.

bah. i want to go home and fall asleep under the covers.