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whats wrong? ill tell you

whats wrong?
ill tell you whats wrong.

my back hurts. as does my neck.

even though i am asleep on my feet at 10.30p, i cant manage to get out of bed before 7.45a. and when my boss is on time for work, im late. which is not even funny-haha-ironic.

i must not be eating enough food because my stomach starts eating itself every four hours.

for at least 6 hours of each day i stare at my work computer as though in a fog. my senses slow down - my reactions, my hearing, my perceptions. my eyes glaze over, my head aches.

my evenings are filled with nots. not cooking, not cleaning, not moving.

its getting harder and harder to ignore that the christmas season is practically sitting on my face (or head, as the case may be). im torn between denying the holiday season and buying presents so as to not upset my family.

who am i kidding - i dont care what they think. but i do at least need to get something for b... i do care what he thinks.

and i cant call melissa to tell her all about it.
thats really whats wrong.