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January 2004 Archives

did i mention?

January 31, 2004

oh, did i mention?
my christmas/anniversary/birthday present arrived via fedex yesterday afternoon?
i squealed like a pig.

im still figuring out what all the buttons do (one button remains quite the mystery), and trying to retrain my fingers to find the zoom and stuff. but im really, really liking it. the movie mode is orgasmic and the options are a bit overwhelming.

you can expect to see some movies posted here once in a while, but nothing like the paris hilton thing. sickos.


January 30, 2004

random link dump.

extraordinary guacamole recipes
mt upgrade suggestion - comment spam
free photoshop album starter edition

theres a stye in your eye

January 30, 2004

pink eye addendum: i just saw the doctor and its not pink eye. its a stye - like a pimple in one of my glands. it just happens to be near the tear duct of my eye.

my styeit should drain on its own, but the doctor stressed that i am to NOT POP IT. you can see the first signs of the draining at the bottom of my cornea.

and apparently it is slightly contagious - but only if i dig my finger in my own eye and then dig the same finger in someone elses eye. and now i have this irresistable urge to poke people in the eye.

but right now ive got one of those awful eyelid twitch things right where this stye is. my guess is that its a teenie alien pod about to break free to wreak havoc, death, and destruction on our poor unprepared planet.

css scrabble

January 30, 2004

you can waste a few hours easy with solitare scrabble with css and javascript (theres also a long dictionary version).

creepy pink eye picture

January 30, 2004

i think i may have pink eye. my eye lids are all swollen and hurting and, well, pink. this from the highly professional diagnosis of the first page of a google search.

im pretty sure that its just a viral strain and that it will go away on its own, but im going to see a doctor this morning just in case. maybe the doctor will make me go home, which would be kinda nice.

what i cant figure out is how i got the stuff. probably one of the volunteers has a child with it, and then i licked their eye. ive been licking a lot of random eyes recently - something i suppose will have to stop.

an ice cream tradition

January 29, 2004

my making ice cream for birthdays is becoming something of a tradition with a highly predictable set of events:

  • i pull out the machine and dump in all the ingredients (i avoid any recipe that calls for cooking the mixture).
  • i set the motor on top and plug it in. nothing moves.
  • i freak out that the machine is broken and its a horrid garage sale purchase that screwed us out of a good five dollars.
  • b pushes me out of the way and launches into a lecture about lining up the outtie with the innie.
  • an argument ensues between b, my brother, and myself about whether the spatula thingy inside is supposed to move inside the tub, or if the tub is supposed to move around the spatula thingy.
  • b declares that the hole in the plastic knob on top of the lid is too small and whips out his knife to shave off 1/128th of an inch from the diameter.
  • b and my brother declare that it is working, and leave me to add the perfect combination of ice and rock salt.
  • we stand around the machine waiting for it to finish while drool hardens on our chins.

also, while heavy whipping cream is not the same thing as heavy cream, it makes for a super-rich substitute in mint ice cream. i couldnt even finish my bowl. in moderation, young grasshopper.


January 28, 2004

the network problem has been solved (fine-a-frick-a-ly) and all is well in whoville. we only lost like, what, 11 hours of work time? no matter, its all better now.

and here comes the obligatory birthday message: 23 feels just like 22.

but oh, tonight will be filled with me-made mint choco chip ice cream, brother-made mexican chocolate cake, and donkey kong goodness.

birthday celebration saturday afternoon - putt putt mini golf at the carlson center. come one, come all, bring gifts.

search engine relationships

January 27, 2004

cool search engine relationship diagram.

trogdor plushie

January 27, 2004

trogdor plushie.

server down

January 27, 2004

there is nothing like spending 8+ hours with your boss in a teeny tiny cramped server closet with no room to turn around without stepping on the other person troubleshooting why the stupid new 24 port switch wont recognize the stupid modem while the entire office twiddles their thumbs and dusts because the server is down and thers nothing else to do but pick your nose.

ride home?

January 26, 2004

who wants to give me a ride home?

just stop

January 26, 2004

stop it.
stop it.

"'Detecting new network hardware.' Do you think that's a good thing?"
"Nothing's plug and play anymore."
"That's why these guys get the big bucks."
"Why are you always so busy?"
"Can you just...?"
"What if we...?"

birthday gift

January 26, 2004

huge thanks to dani for my awesome birthday gift!
i love it!


January 26, 2004

when you have two full pages of dream notes from the past month and a half, you know that its time to crack down on fleshing them out.

im such a slacker.

what will they think of next

January 26, 2004

a volunteer: "I'm still amazed at the idea. Of a fax, you know. That you can put something in and it comes out on a different machine. I just do not understand all this technology."


January 25, 2004

let us look at the evidence.

  • our new(ish) doge neon.

    last saturday the clutch quit working, almost like the cable snapped (even though i know they dont use cables in the newer models, thats what it felt like). the clutch randomly bounced around and when we pulled over the car was stuck in neutral. we towed it to the husbands work with my brothers tow rope (highly illegal) and called for the tow truck. it was a bit colder than negative 40 degrees (fahrenheit) and our ears tingled a bright red all night long.

    we already had an appointment scheduled at the dodge dealer to fix an oil leak on wednesday, so the clutch problem was just added to the list.

    turns out the master cylindar decided to jump ship which caused the leak and the clutch failure, which means its all covered under warranty. they had to order parts and we wont get it until tuesday at the earliest.

  • [ii] our isuzu rodeo.

    the weekend the neons clutch went out, the transmission light in the rodeo started blinking and the transmission was losing its mind. it had a huge identity crisis all week long. its an automatic. 'low' believed itself to be first gear (good), 'second' believed itself to be third, and 'drive' thought it was fourth. which made driving fun.

    we got an appointment for it on friday, but they were unable to get to it that day (what is the point of making an appointment if there is a completely random chance that the mechanic will be able to get the vehicle into the shop?). hopefully tomorrow they can get it in.

  • [iii] my boss's chevy blazer.

    my boss was kind enough to lend us his behemouth blazer for the weekend. friday after work it wouldnt start. i got a jump and it started immediately, almost like it didnt really need the jump. i drove around all friday night and left the car running while not in it because it was cold out and the car wasnt warming up right.

    saturday morning it wouldnt start. i hung out with my brother saturday afternoon and borrowed his battery charger. i hooked up the charger sunday afternoon to get to church and it acted strange. my brother came and gave it a jump but still it would not start.

three cars in our possession all rendered unusable within the past week. and its not like we can just walk to where we need to go - not at twenty and thirty below zero. we are back to bumming rides to work.

its enough to make me want to cry.

hey ya

January 23, 2004

hey ya, charlie brown.
the perfect picker-upper going into the weekend.


January 23, 2004

Let pastors who act like used car salesmen govern my people.

thwarted goof

January 23, 2004

my plans to goof off and run amok in the office have been thwarted by an interviewee no-show that caused management to be in their office rather than interviewing the interviewee. bugger.

RE: Re: [Re:]

January 23, 2004

at what point, i wonder, did i stop coming up with original subject lines for email correspondance? there was a point once when i would never stoop so low as to send an email with a subject line that started with an RE. but now i just cant be bothered with originality. what happened?


January 22, 2004

dear gold box,

please stop suggesting i buy freshwater pearl stud earrings.

thank you.

cotton candy autopsy

January 22, 2004

beautiful stories for ugly children: a cotton candy autopsy (nsftaoc*)

* not safe for those afraid of clowns


January 21, 2004

before we were married, b would spend each summer earning the big bucks on a commercial fishing boat. he would be gone for weeks at a time, our main form of communication was via letter through the tenders (boats that buy the fish from the individual boats).

i wrote him just about every day about what i did, how horrid my boss was, cool stuff i saw on tv - it was basically like my blog but with more mushy-kissy crap.

i decorated each envelope every night before i mailed it. pens, markers, stickers, pencils, lipstick (mushy-kissy crap, i tell you). but what i really enjoyed was to make my own envelope from magazine pages that caught my eye.

i always used a disassembled envelope as my template. i wish i had something like these craft templates back then - it would have made those letters much more interesting to look at. though b never complained.

periodic table

January 21, 2004

interactive periodic table displays include element samples and examples of its application. not to mention being simply beautiful.

css pencils

January 20, 2004

what do you get when you take an image file, recreate it pixel for pixel in css with 1,452 divs, and then apply pseudo filters to it?

css pencils! scroll down to the CSS Pencils Demo Versions header to get past the explanation mumbo jumbo.

as the crazy genious creator says, "Madness? Certainly. Practical? Doubtful. Amazing? I hope so."

vagina eyes

January 20, 2004

while i was gone from the office, Justa The Mail Carrier brought me the newest wonder that is the veer visual elements catalog.

i usually love to take my sweet time oohing and ahhing over their illustration and photography available for purchase. then i drool over their font collections that would so be worth the money if this little non-profit had tons of money that allowed for a font budget (cream!).

ive been unable to take my eyes away from the cover image - a doll wearing prescription glasses - but not for reasons you might expect. it haunts me in my sleep.

the doll with vagina eyes

the doll with the vagina eyes.

glass shards

January 20, 2004

how to get glass shards out of your unmentionables.

champagne chair contest

January 20, 2004

the folks at design within reach held a Champagne Chair Contest over the holidays. contestants were to send in miniature chairs sculpted out of wine bottle corks and tops.

the 22 finalists are adorable and beautiful. i would love to have a few of them on my desk at work.



January 19, 2004

i hate coming back to work after a few days off and finding that not only has someone been on my computer, but they were in my outlook and sent at least one mass mailing with my signature at the bottom. it was most likely my supervisor, but i cant help but feel violated.

in the er

January 16, 2004

a quick trip to the emergency room is a great way to break up the monotony of a four day weekend. b passed out at work and got a smooth ambulance ride to the hospital.

everything is okay and he is home fine.

i need to give his boss some quick tips on how to deliver news such as this to a family member and/or spouse: "b was involved in an incident at the hospital about an hour ago and is now at the hospital. we dont know exactly what happened, but dont worry."

dont worry? my husband is an armed guard that carries around a lot of stuff like money and gold - stuff that people like to steal and kill other people for. if hes ever involved in any 'incident' on the job, of course im going to worry. with the boss's attitude about stuff, an incident could be anything from a gunshot wound to a hangnail.

he could go insane and start shooting his partners and random bank tellers - what a happy little incident.

time filler

January 15, 2004

one of the problems with a last-minute four day weekend is trying to fill it with schtuff. what am i going to do while everyone else is working?

  • give the dog a haircut (she badly needs one)
  • shopping for groceries
  • do the dishes
  • dust down the apartment
  • hit the thrift stores
  • pull out the scrapbooking stuff
  • paint my nails
  • record dreams ive had in the last month
  • take lots of pictures of... things

anything to keep me from aimlessly surfing online being bored and depressed, right?

time off

January 14, 2004

at the very last minute, i have thursday and friday off from work.


January 14, 2004

my hair is in pigtails today.
the ends somehow keep ending up on my lips.
in my teeth.

i thought i had gotten over the habit of chewing my own hair.

no sympathy

January 14, 2004

if you work on a spreadsheet all day - for hours and hours - and never once save your document, you have no right to complain when your computer crashes (like its prone to do) and you lose everything. you have no right to be angry that your computer crashed. you have no right to be using a computer at all.

do not expect me to shed tears for you.

have my firstborn, please

January 14, 2004

the whole microchip-in-key-feature thing? makes for not only Super Expensive Keys, but also Must Sell Firstborn Auto Start.
bugger. that option is out.

youre in eight

January 13, 2004

drinking the minimum suggested 64 ounces (8 eight-ounce glasses) of water every day causes ones bladder to continually fill. and it will not feel empty, even after doing what one would do to empty said bladder.

zero to hero

January 13, 2004

from zero to hero in no time flat (quicktime).


ukulele james

January 13, 2004

what do the super mario 3 theme, inspector gadget theme, and the flight of the bumblebee all have in common?

ukulele james is what.
playing a great assortment of classics and original work on his possessed ukulele hands. the sound is so great and unusual and bound to drive many people nuts - i think i might have to have it.


its a feature

January 13, 2004

our new spankin car has a microchip embedded in the key. regular keys will unlock the doors and turn in the ignition, but the car will not remain running. the dealer forgot to mention to us that all spare keys will have to be made at the dodge dealer in town.

$46 for the key and its cut.
$20 for the stupid thing to be programmed.

over $60 per key.
and i cant get this 'feature' disabled from the car.
great way to ensure cash flow back to the dealership.

oh yeah

January 12, 2004
  • power windows
  • power locks
  • 5 speed manual transmission
  • dual front airbags
  • rear spoiler
  • antilock brakes
  • 2.0 liter, 4 cylindar, 132 horsepower
  • dual exhaust
  • traction control
  • cruise control
  • remote keyless entry
  • in-dash 4 cd changer
  • power sunroof
  • the whole kit
  • and the caboodle

2002 Dodge Neon R/T


January 10, 2004


birthday april

January 9, 2004

happy birthday, april!

(her birthday reminds me that im turning 23 soon, not 24 as my birthday announcement above has indicated. how did that happen?)

christmas decorations

January 8, 2004

last year we didnt put up any christmas decorations. i tried my hardest to not celebrate christmas, because doing so would acknowledge and accept that life goes on without my sister.

this year i was emotionally able to set up the tree and other assorted ornamentation. i could go shopping and hum along with the carols. i could wrap and get excited about giving gifts.

last night i took the tree and all christmas-y decorations down. while we didnt move stuff around to make room for the tree, there is now a huge, gaping hole where it once stood. and again i was reminded of the huge, gaping hole in my life where melissa once stood. it may not be as painful as it once was, but it still exists. and i still really miss her.

it has begun

January 7, 2004

apparently i have been appointed a judge in a contest.
makes me feel all warm-squishy-special like.
its the Official That's My Blog Stalker of 2004 Contest.

nominate someone you love.
nominate someone you hate.
nominate yourself.
nominate your mother.
nominate your dog.
nominate your naughty bits.

and dont forget that i can be bought.

three point five

January 7, 2004

pillow nirvana is most easily found three and a half seconds after one turns off the alarm and rolls over.
once pillow nirvana has you, it does not want to let go.


January 6, 2004

fontifier will take a scanned sample of your handwriting and turn it into a windows or mac os x true type font in thirty seconds. and the best part is that its free (for now)!

the only part i found frustrating was its interpretation of thin lines. it suggests using a felt tip pen; i first used an ultra fine permanent marker because some of my letters take up a bunch of space (the lowercase g, q, and y, for example) so i wanted to write my sample letters pretty small. the font i got back was really sketchy with a lot of missing and/or ghosty looking lines. the pen that finally worked for me was a black fine tip permanent.

im not 100% satisfied with the results, but hey - it took all of one minute to do and cost me absolutely nothing. if i really really wanted the font letters to overlap like my writing does, i would have to take a whole lot more time with a font creation program and do the thing myself.

download the true type font Valette.
just one more way for you to stalk me.


mayfly 2003

January 5, 2004

my 2003, a mayfly project:

experienced the Heimlich maneuver.
overwhelming grief.
heiyachow and squashpatcha.
arctic circle.
gardening and photography.
totaled the car.


January 5, 2004

the knife in my mini leatherman is shaaarp.

art of apology

January 3, 2004

the lost art of the apology (mirrored).
a little something we could all learn.

even if you hold fast to I'm Never Wrong syndrome, you can still apologize for hurting the other persons feelings; it rare to feel good about hurting the feelings of someone you are close to. apologizing for hurt feelings (rather than incidents or actions) is a great way to open up flows of communication and get everyone feeling a bit better.

and after an hour of fighting, thats usually all i want to hear: im sorry i hurt you.

what to do

January 1, 2004

what do people do on new years day, anyway?

every single thing is closed.
are there family traditions to be followed?
specials on television to watch?

is everyone (besides me) nurturing their hangover?
is that the only event worth doing on new years day?

Additional Content

Hi, I'm Valette

I'm a photographer based out of Anchorage, Alaska. I've recently become a wife, a stepmother, and a homeowner. Life is pretty awesome. You can email me anytime. Learn more...

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