Only in my dreams
There was a time where I dreamed about her very often. At first she was the main focus of a dream as my subconscious tried time and time again to save her. I would drive in circles looking for the hospital as she bled next to me, I would stand between her and imminent danger, I would watch again and again as I could not save her.
More time went on and she slid into the background of many of my dreams. She wasn't the main focus, but she was still there watching and waiting. I still needed her to be present, a silent partner, to be there while I worked through other issues.
She is not in my dreams much anymore, a sign of my healing grief.
I've been trying all day to recover from last night's dream. The song on the radio, the softball pitcher practicing at a nearby field, little things are pointing me in her direction, towards he absence in this world.
I can still feel my arms around her, can still feel her head on my shoulder, still feel the need to protect her. I still don't want to let go.
2 Comments
I was thinking about her tonight. She was such a sweet loving person, I wish so much that she was still with us all. I'm so sorry Valette. Sending my love and hugs.
We are all at the same place - tying to hang on to the lost.
Love you muchly